Wanted

Wanted: Zookeeper

This job entails:

•  rounding up all crazy, spastic morning animals and getting them out of the Strawberry bed.  
• Feeding them.  
• Running them till they are tired and no longer a threat to themselves or the Strawberry.
• cleaning their cage aka the house

 
 

Qualifications:  somebody.....anybody!!!  oh, and knowing how to declaw a kitten gets you to the top of the list! 



Inquire within...look for the woman with crazy eyes and unkempt hair.  Actually, you'll recognize her;  she'll be the wild-eyed woman running toward you with open arms.  Throw chocolate at her and she'll settle down.

That's a hot!!!!

Have I mentioned lately how very h.o.t. it is in south tejas?  I could literally melt! The other day I swept and mopped the whole house and didn't come close to the meltdown I had when I walked outside to change the insurance cards in the glove compartment. I mean "sheesh!!!" What's with that?!  I came inside and had to take a shower.  My clothes were sticking to me and it really wasn't the look I was going for that day.  Really; How can those builders and street workers, etc do it?  There is a special air-conditioned place in heaven for them because they have already lived and worked in hell's climate.

One good thing about this heat is all my fruit consumption.  I can't get enough of watermelon and cantaloupe, although my checkbook says "whoa!!!!"  Why does cantaloupe have to be so dang expensive?  It's not like I'm trying to buy it out of season... or is it out of season?  They (just who are "they?") say the body craves whatever nutrients it needs.  Mine is craving juicy, sweet stuff.  Thankfully it is fruit and not the "you know of what I speak!"  I don't want to tempt any Grainiacs out there.  I've heard from a few of you and you are having success with some weight loss.  Keep up the good work!! I'm proud of y'all!! Now it is time for me to get back on that weight horse.  Kaaaa has been tempted to bite me a time or two.  I will not let that slithering snake of a scale strike!

Wake me in a Month

Ev'ry day is like survival.

Culture Club's Karma Cameleon

I've been a little reflective the past couple of days.  I think it has to do with partying with some high school friends this past weekend.  I woke up thinking about a boy in my 8th grade.  I'll say it: he liked me and I, well to put it bluntly, was not the least bit interested in him.  In my 8th grade book we couldn't be friends because he was always "hitting" on me (translation: I wasn't very nice to him).

I wanted to write about memories and reflections and that sort of sappy stuff today, but instead I thought I'd share my morning.

A.M. Yoga- What a way to start the day- all zen-like and calm...not in my strawberry patch!

I lay down my mat and set up the player.  I turn around and Garbage Gut is playing with his slobbery dog toy....on my mat!!!

grrrr to these two!!!

I shoo him off the mat and begin my yoga routine.  Calm, surrender....  kak....kak....kak....gag...gag.... Ollie is throwing up a furball near my head.

Kitzilla assessing the damage.  Yep, that's a fur ball alright

Kitzilla might have been the culprit, but I doubt it.  The culprit usually doesn't return to the crime scene!

I continue with my yoga reverting to my mode of "selective hearing" or my Scarlett O'hara "I can't think about that right now. If I do, I'll go crazy. I'll think about that tomorrow."

You know, I have enough to do without the critters adding more to my day.  After Kitzilla ate, she decided to bring the dish down with her.  Garbage Gut says "Gee, thanks!  This is my lucky day!!!"

Garbage Gut assessing the damage.  Yep, that's cat food alright

nom, nom,nom....wonder how much this vet bill will be???

 I keep the cat food up on the counter in the laundry room so Garbage Gut will NOT get into the cat food.  I have plenty of vet bills to prove that!

And lest you think the new baby kitty is an angel, she knocked over the jar with the colorful pipe cleaners and is happily playing and I am unhappily playing "pick up sticks."

Yep, that's a lime green pipe cleaner and not Hermie the Wormie

Do you believe in what goes around, comes around?  I'm beginning to believe it.  Now I know why I awoke  thinking about my dear departed 8th grade friend.

Let's just name my morning "Karma!"

My life is an exclamation!

How have you been Grainiacs?  It's been a while, I know.  Truly this past semester of classes kept my nose in the books and my head in a constant "say what????" 

I really think the stress of going back to school is packing on the fat on my belly.  Yeah, that's it; it's the classes I'm taking.  Education is hazardous to your weight!!  I mean we've read about the Freshman 15; how about the Grad Fifty?!?  Funny thing about my family: all of my children LOST weight when they went to college.  Instead of gaining 15, they lost 15.  It must be me and Hubby.  We are the culprits.  No one else can take the blame.  I admit it.... I love food and not just any food.....ICE CREAM!!!!  PIE!!!!  If it's creamy, it's MINE!!!!!  Okay, enough with the exclamations!!  really, last time.

I love life.  I do.  I love being here.  I love meeting with friends (had a great girls' weekend last week).  I love talking on the phone...or browsing the internet.  I love driving.  I love watching a good sitcom.  I LOVE going to the movies.  Do you notice anything about my "loves?"  I just did.  They are all sedentary activities.  I wish I loved exercising.  Or playing tennis.  Or running or even walking.  I do love swimming, but I don't love getting TO the pool and I especially don't like public pools.  I guess I'm becoming somewhat of a germ-a-phobe.  I really loved going to a wellness center last summer but we don't have one here in cucaracha-ville.

So what's a lazy-ass strawberry to do?  First things first.  I've started back with my yoga routine.  Okay, so it's not a routine yet, but it will be!!  AND...I'm giving up ice cream for a week (you really don't know how hard that will be here in the south Texas heat!).  Instead I'm going to make healthy popsicles.  For a creamy popsicle, I can either make a frozen yogurt popsicle or I can buy the low-cal fudgsicle at the store.

I'm back to the baby steps that helped me lose 15 pounds.  I cannot be disgusted with myself because this has to be a changed lifestyle.  I eat too much Mexican food, too much fast food, too many Diet Cokes, and too many sweets.  Life as I know it will end, but life will not end.  I can still love being here!  I can still love meeting with friends!  I can still love movies! and cold things!  And I can still use my exclamations!!!

Strike Three!

A couple of weeks ago, I decided to cut the mop off my head.  In order to save money I called the beauty college behind my house.  It was a little after 3 p.m. and  I was informed that their last hair appointment was 3 because they close at 4, but to come tomorrow at 10 a.m. no appointment necessary.  That was a Tuesday.  My Wednesday was crazy busy (what's new?).  So Thursday was THE DAY!!!   I headed behind my house to the beauty college.

When I entered the building I noticed no one was behind the reception desk and several people were in an office chatting and just looking at me.  I smiled and waited.  hmmmm

Finally a woman walks over and begins to speak.  I recognize her voice; the same voice telling me to come at 10 a.m. when they open.

I tell her I want a cut.

"Oh, Miss. Everyone in class.  You come back at 10:30."

In a strained cheerful voice (I don't know, maybe my teeth were clenched because I was thinking "Why didn't you say this Tuesday when I called!") I responded "Okay!"

Well heck, what do you expect for a $4.00 cut.  Then I worried....what if I get a cut that looks like a four dollar cut???!!!

I got in my car and headed toward Supercuts.  As I arrive I realize there is NO ONE in the parking lot.  Do you ever wonder about "the why" there is no one in the parking lot of an establishment?  Like maybe there is a reason why no one is there???  I start doubting.  Is Supercuts the right place for my haircut?

I see movement in the building so I get out and walk in.  A smiling face comes to me and I am reassured this is where I need to be.  I go to her chair and show her a picture of the hair style I want.  I know stylists cringe when a thinning straight-haired person wants a super curly thick style AND no perm please!  hahahaha.  The style I want is one I have had before so I know it will work.  She looks at it and exclaims "It's a bob!"

"Will that be a problem?"

She assures me no and says on Thursday, they will be having a workshop on bobs and would I like to wait and come back.

"It IS Thursday," I whine!  I want my haircut, darn-it.

She tells me next week and it will be free!  Wow, I was worried about my $4.00 haircut looking like $4.00.  But FREE?  I'm in!

It is not exactly what I wanted but here I am after the cut.

Strawberry getting in the car before the wind plays havoc with new hairstyle!

Here I am in the bathroom trying to get a better look at the cut.  Those rearview mirrors aren't big enough!!!

The wind played havoc so I brushed out "my way"

Don't you just love the shower and toilet in the background?  Gee, anyone can sit in a bed of bluebonnets!

Want fries with that membership?

Do you remember the old monthly cosmetic membership clubs?  Back in the 70's when I was starting to wear make-up, I joined one; the name escapes me, but it was some beauty club.   For $9.99 + shipping and handling, you could receive a box of cosmetics right to your door. I got to sample expensive (to me!) products.  As a matter of fact, I still have a dark circle eye minimizer-- I know I should throw it away but I just can't seem to get rid of it.  I don't use it and it reminds me of days gone by!  My Mom for years and years had a membership to Doubleday Book Club.  In the 80's when I was out on my own, I, too, joined Doubleday.  I love books too.  I'm a hoarder; what can I say???

Well I just found out; I still have a love for those membership clubs.  No, I didn't subscribe to a book club or a cosmetic club.  This is my NEW love: paper-crafting!  You knew that, right?  You knew it was just a matter of time before I found something having to do with making cards?!?!

I succumbed and joined and yesterday  I received my first box!

Oh goodness!  How will I ever concentrate on my Theology studies?????  I posted on my FB page that all I wanted to do was play.  A former seminary student said John Calvin, a Reformation theologian would say I was "predestined to play!"  Hahahaha...So true.  Looky!  Now tell me, would you rather study theology or make fun cards with these goodies??

Colors and stamps and paper and pens, oh my!

I can always put off housework, studying, working, gardening, laundry, etc etc.  Paper, pens, stamps, bling, adhesive seems to call my name.  Wish I could figure out how to make a decent living out of it!  But then it wouldn't be "play;" it would be "work," and you know how I feel about THAT!!!!

Here is a new technique I learned.  Feathers!!!!

what to do with so many stickers?

I AM a masterpiece! HA

But let's face it, wouldn't we rather be sitting in a beach chair sipping a tropical drink?

Oh how I love to play and craft!!!!

Update:  Day 1 of meatless week went off without a hitch.  I did eat more wheat than I wanted, but hey, what can I say?  I was afraid to go to the store with all that Easter candy on sale!  

Breakfast: Took Boy to his 8 a.m. class and then stopped off at Jack in the Box and got a biscuit with egg and cheese (and NO, I am not going vegan).

Lunch: Picked up Boy and we stopped off at Stars to get a couple of salads.  They make egg-cellant salads.  Hubby and I love them because they include a hard-boiled egg with the lettuce, tomatoes, cucumbers, cheese and carrots. (Hubby is not going meat-free this week, so he had grilled chicken on his salad.)

Dinner: Ate out twice so here's the poor person dinner-- 2 pieces of toast with peanut butter.  A bowl of yogurt with blueberries and granola.
And ahem, a few pieces of chocolate.  I tell ya, I can sniff that stuff out!

All in all, not a bad day for my first vegetarian day.  I've told Boy to keep reminding me that I'm doing this.  Old habits are hard to break and I have to constantly remind myself about what I'm doing or supposed to be doing.  

Oh yeah, time to read Calvin!!!

This little piggy

I am a carnivore.  I admit it.  I am also an animal lover.  I cry during those adopt an abused animals commercials and feel an uncontrollable urge to pick up every stray animal on the street.  I honk at cows ("Cows, Bella!") and have an almost unhealthy relationship with the birds in my backyard.  (I try to run off the neighborhood hawk that likes to munch on MY birdies!)  Yet I continue to eat beef and poultry without a thought of how it got to my table.  I do the proverbial "stick my head in the sand" because quite frankly I didn't want that knowledge to taint my food.

The apostle Paul says in Romans 7:15 (The Message):  What I don't understand about myself is that I decide one way, but then I act another, doing things I absolutely despise.  Can anyone say "Strawberry!!!!"    So here's the news.  I am taking the US Veg Week pledge to go meatless not just on Monday, but all week long.  You might not want to come by and see me this week; your thigh might be too tempting!  It is best to call or text and keep in contact with Hubby and Boy too!
No, really, all joking aside my moral compass is telling me that God created EVERYTHING and called it good.  God did not say eat and practice unfair and cruelty upon my creations just like God did not say to totally destroy the earth with cruelty and unfair practices (that is a post for a different time).  All I can say with certainty is I will go meatless this whole week.  If it leads to a lifestyle change-- all the better.
Below, I've posted a snippet off their webpage.  Hopefully their link will go through.  If not, check out usvegweek.com for more information.  I would love to have some company on this journey.  Any carnivores ready for a change?  For this week?  This little piggy wants to know....  

 
From the USVegWeek.com website:

Kicking off on Meatless Monday and the day before Earth Day, US VegWeek 2014 (April 21-27) is a weeklong celebration exploring the many benefits of vegetarian eating—for our health, the planet, and animals. This year’s celebration will be bigger and better than ever!
Restaurants are offering specials on delicious vegan fare; events from cooking demonstrations to movie screenings are being held throughout the country; and thousands of people nationwide — including elected officials— are taking the 7-Day VegPledge. After all, with 52 weeks in a year, why not make at least one meat-free?
Compassion Over Killing launched VegWeek in 2009 in Takoma Park, Maryland (our hometown) thanks to the inspiration of MD Senator Jamie Raskin. Sen. Raskin eagerly signed up as the first person to take our 7-Day VegPledge — a pledge he’s kept to this day — and VegWeek was officially recognized by our city through a Mayoral Proclamation.  Energized by his new vegetarian diet, which he refers to as “aligning my morals with my menu,” Sen. Raskin has since helped COK expand our VegWeek campaign into a nationwide effort encouraging people choose meat-free foods as a way to build a kinder, cleaner, and healthier world.