A New Year; A New Blog

Good morning, Grainiacs! Be forewarned....this post is a scramble of thoughts and emotions.

I have been silent for too long.  Truth be told, I was a little blue.  I wasn't feeling like myself because I really didn't know who "myself" was anymore.

I knew my "before" self.  Raising children, working as a Christian educator for my church, a student.  I felt like I had a purpose.  Then the kids grew up and are succeeding and thriving.  I graduated (with honors, I might add) and I haven't been able to find a job in my field for over a decade.  I am super busy with plenty of volunteer activities.  And I cannot forget that I'm my Mom's medical proxy and that is Very Important.

I have been feeling stuck, Grainiacs, and I don't like the feeling one little bit.

So it is time to take action.  We are coming up on a new year. New goals. New opportunities to redefine myself and my life.  Time to prioritize and decide what is important (family) and what can be postponed for the time being or totally dropped.

I am de-cluttering my life, my cabinets and closets, my body, and my brain.

Years ago, I picked up Dr. Phil's "The Ultimate Weight Solution" and read part of it and promptly boxed it up.  I am reacquainting myself with his philosophy and marked a page to read everyday.  I will share it with you because I think it describes whatever blockage we possess...whether weight, social, mental, etc.

"You have generated and adopted a lifestyle to sustain it" (referring to being overweight). You have set up that lifestyle, based upon numerous self-destructive behaviors such as overeating, bingeing, not exercising, and self-defeating internal dialogue, that have contributed to and sustained your weight problem.  You have set up your world to keep yourself overweight, even though you consciously confess that you want to be fit, energetic, and of normal weight.  You make sure your life revolves around food. If you are chronically overweight, I know that your manner of living can be characterized as inert, harried, and chaotic."

I have become inert, harried, and chaotic.  A friend recently pointed this out to me.  I get a call and I go.  I don't think twice that I haven't eaten breakfast and will be famished by the time I arrive. I forget to bring things to do while we wait at the dr. office.  I'm just "harried and chaotic."

So my blog posts for a while will be about changing my ways of doing things.  I've tried in the past but then my excuse is "life gets in the way."  No more excuses.  No more running out the door.  No more!

Starting today I will organize and redesign myself from the inside out.  I have some skeletons in my closet that need pushing out.  Moana is a BIG skeleton...my inner child wants to sabotage any good thought or action I want to take.  It's time to take charge of Moana.

Walk along with me if you will.  It might get sticky...and I don't mean caramel sticky...okay..maybe a little caramel sticky.

Peace out, Grainiacs.  Love you, Strawberry.